True Love - My perspective

Love - the tingling sensation and the jittery feeling when someone special comes in person or in your thoughts. I am talking about that deep down, life changing, earth shaking, always-and-forever kind of love—the stuff of poetry and legend.

Many people are skeptical, and for good reason. Today’s culture isn’t very fertile ground for romance.  With social media, text messaging and online dating, we’ve revolutionized communication but we’ve lost the art of relationships. There are very few success stories. Most of the time it seems like there are very few people having real, face-to-face conversations anymore.

But I believe and I know that - True love is Real, Deep, Unconditional & Everlasting. The reason it is so rare is because it is so misunderstood.

Most people’s idea of TRUE LOVE looks something like this: Mr. or Mrs. Right is waiting out there somewhere, THE ONE they are destined to be with. And that special someone is looking for them too, and it’s only a matter of time before they meet each other—and of course, they’ll both live happily ever after.

NONSENSE it is.

Happily ever after never exists. And God never hand picks one special person just for you. In fact, the whole idea of finding fulfillment in someone else is an illusion.

The truth is, love can only be found within.

Most people who are looking for love OUT THERE are actually just running away from loneliness. They constantly settle for less than what they want, and less than what they deserve, because their greatest fear is to be alone, grow old alone and die alone.

The fear of loneliness prevents us from experiencing the real intimacy.
True love lies beyond that fear. We have to face that  FOREVER EMPTY the unquenchable sadness deep within us; the ever present knowledge of our own mortality, that in the end we all face death all alone.

The truth is that real love requires real inner work that most people just aren’t interested in. It requires that we first be happy in our solitude; that we come to know ourselves, accept ourselves and love ourselves. We have to find our peace of mind, find our purpose, our passion. We lay down the ego’s defenses and be naked and vulnerable; that we give up our planning and fantasizing about the future and live in the NOW. Only then are we really ready to love. When you fully grasp that tomorrow is not guaranteed—that this moment is truly all that we have—there is nothing to do but give everything you’ve got, expecting nothing in return.

In fact, you know in advance that your heart will be broken. You will be lied to, you will be taken for granted; you will be hurt and disappointed. Sooner or later, between here and your deathbed, you will have to say goodbye.
You know it, you accept it, and you love anyway.

Real love is divine. It comes from a relationship with God, a dance with emptiness which takes us beyond the human self, beyond the ego’s petty games to know a timeless love; to taste the fullness of joy.

What we call TRUE LOVE is that rare and sacred union that happens when two people join in this dance together.

It is a friendship, a love affair and an act of worship. passion, lust, affection, caring, trust, respect and devotion all become part of the exquisite surrender. Lovers merge with each other and with the vast, wild universe. Neither knows for sure if it will last a weekend or a lifetime. It doesn’t matter.

All that matters is this moment of oneness—holy and beautiful.

It contains eternity.

Don't get me wrong

I am not saying that relationships are bad and that you should avoid getting in them. 

In fact, getting into meaningful relationships is one of the most important and significant things that can happen to a person throughout their lifetime.

Finding a person that genuinely connects with you and the entirety of who you are can be unmatched by anything else that happens to you throughout your lifetime.

But sadly most of the times in life this does not happen. Fairy tales are not always real. Even in the most beautiful relationships there are discords, misjudgements, fights etc. but how soon we get out of these and how much efforts we apply to resolve the differences makes all the difference.

Life itself is not beautiful it is all about how beautiful we want it to be.

Don't get me wrong.......

Be Yourself

You are special, and there is no need to want to be special.

You are special, you are unique—existence never creates anything less than that. 

Everyone is unique, utterly unique. There has been no person like you before, and there will never be a person like you again.

Consciousness has taken this form for the first time and the last time, so there is no need to try to become special: you already are.

If you are trying to be special, you will become ordinary. Your very effort is rooted in misunderstanding. It will create confusion because when you try to become special, you have taken one thing for grated—that you are not special. 

You have become ordinary already. You have missed the point

Give The SELF a chance

We all have a higher Self within; we were born with it. Sometimes we get a fleeting glimpse of the Self when we spontaneously act out of unconditional love. Recall a sudden wave of empathy engulfing you at the sight of a man shivering in the cold that prompted you to give him clothes; picking up a wounded animal on the road; the deep sense of fulfilment on rescuing someone in trouble. These arouse an incredible flow of energy and feelings within.

Momentarily, you rise from an ordinary state of being to an extraordinary one. The shift is spontaneous, unintentional and instinctive. You forget who you are: your status, position, your miseries; you act without assigning reason and logic. Neither do you expect reward or recognition in return. These are moments when your higher Self takes over.

The Self is a vast storehouse of positive energy that propels us to extend ourselves unconditionally. We drop our masks: our ego-self, the finite, entrenched in inhibitions, doubts, hesitations. But no sooner than the ego takes over, we again restrain ourselves from reaching out. Our conditioned mind constitutes our ego-self that endorses judgements, evaluations, biases, prejudices, predispositions. We gathered all this ignorantly and continue this way out of sheer habit, impeding manifestation of the Self.

The Self is the internal abundance that can be realized at our will any time. It has the power to nourish, nurture, absorb and inspire. All we need is to have faith and surrender our ego-self to the higher Self.

Give The SELF a chance.

A SPLITTING HEADACHE - sharing a post which I received and relate to.

*A SPLITTING HEADACHE*... 

The proprietor of a coffee shop had been busy all day. Being Saturday, it was very crowded & the customers were just unending. He had been on his toes since morning. Towards the evening he felt a splitting headache surfacing. As the clock ticked away, his headache worsened. Unable to bear it, he stepped out of the shop leaving his staff to look after the sales. He walked across the street to the Chemist, to buy himself a painkiller to relieve his headache. He swallowed the pill & felt relieved. He knew that in a few minutes he would feel better. As he strolled out of the shop, he casually asked the salesgirl, "Where is Mr Savarkar (the Chemist)? He's not at the cash counter today!" The girl replied, "Sir, Mr Savarkar had a splitting headache & said he was going across to the coffee shop. He said a cup of hot coffee would relieve him of his headache." 

The man's mouth went dry & he mumbled, "Oh! I see." This is a typical case of looking outside ourselves for something that we have within us. How strange but true! The chemist relieves his headache by drinking coffee & the coffee shop owner finds relief in a pain relieving pill! 

A man hunts across the lengths & breadths of the universe to find peace. 

Eventually he finds it in his heart & realizes that peace is really a state of mind. 

He undertakes many a pilgrimage to find God. 

Eventually he realizes that God is the in- dweller of the heart.

Life has its own ways of teaching us.....Amazing.

Radical acceptance to our rescue

The idea that we can fix perceived flaws in our partners, friends, parents, and grown children remains a promise of something that is unobtainable.

A healthy dose of ego often convinces us that our way of looking at things is right, but if we try to correct someone else it usually backfires.

Most of the times it implies that we are more enlightened and that we have a deeper knowledge of what’s best. The other person may get the message that he or she isn’t good enough and will in every probability become resentful.

A safer approach would be to look inward to fix the problem. This involves the recognition that you will never be in sync about some matters.

We have to accept the fact ‘We have this permanent difference, but we need to learn to live with each other’.

SOULS AND KARMIC CONNECTIONS

We have traveled through many lifetimes and lived with many different souls amidst family, friends or those who don't really get along with us.

Some may have even tried to harm us emotionally, physically or spiritually.

All said and done, we all are the same and belong to only one group that is SOULS.

We have all traveled together in different lifetimes and have shared various relationships with each other -

Father-mother

Husband-wife

Uncle-aunt

Brother-sister

Friends

Neighbors

Servants

Drivers and even so-called enemies

Each person is a soul that tries to help the other move forward spiritually and reduce the karmic luggage.

Sometimes the soul that loves us the most, might willingly take birth as an enemy or a tormentor in a lifetime, just to help us work out our karma.

Thus, a person who we think hates us and we in return hate, might be our greatest well-wisher spiritually.

He or she may be responsible for our becoming spiritual or compassionate.

That very person who is creating hell in our lives may bring us closer to spirituality.

In the present lifetime, he/she may be doing so because that could be the only way to teach us a lesson.

Sometimes, a soul is reborn just to comfort us and be there in times of need.

So, who is our friend and who is our enemy?

They all are part of the soul family that wants to help us and wants help in return.

Sometimes an opportunity comes in the form of a disaster.

Sometimes, the only way to grow spiritually and in life  is through pain, sorrow and turmoil.

That is when life seems strange.

Hence, never form judgements, abuse or hate and never say nasty things about anyone.

Who knows we may be harming the soul who loves us the most spiritually but we are not able to recognize it as the soul is wearing a different body in this particular lifetime.