TWO HALVES

Today I am reminded of what enlightened me a few years back.. and lead me into the memory lane - An old lady who used to sit opposite a Masjid near Milan subway in Mumbai.

🌸

*Giving is living.* Give someone a smile to hang on to, give a hand to hold on to; give a shoulder to cry on, give a reason to lean on..

Moving on from there:

Charity. Just a good food for thought.

*A small charity is no big deal. It's a basic human duty.* Do it individually. One for one, one on one, ends up helping one and all. (Don't donate to NGO and wash your hands off, you be a one-man / one-woman NGO yourself and make the difference!)

I see this thus:

This world is divided broadly into 2 categories.

No, not male and female; not rich and poor; not 'ucch' and 'neech'; not 'harijan' and 'girijan'; not even Hindu and Muslim... *it's just the 'haves' and 'have-nots'.*

*Two halves.*

Haves and have-nots are not necessarily the rich and the poor.  Haves are resourceful, viable, feasible and utilitarians. Have-nots are downtrodden, helpless, suppressed and needy.
*They both co-exist and co-exit.*

And hence,

Goodness of a 'have' is to GIVE so that a 'have-not' can LIVE. Godliness of a 'have-not' is to BLESS so that a 'have' can feel the BLISS.

If every 'have' takes care of one 'have-not', each of the have-nots is taken care of. And there by, half the world is taken care of.

And the other half?

It can count its blessings.

😊
Isn't it then, a win-win situation?

Pick one. Make one. Today itself. His/her tomorrow is not far away. It's in your closed palms. Just open it. And hand it over. 🌻

"We are not born as humans, we are born to be humans."

Let's be.
🙏

The above write up is shared by a dear friend of mine Mr. Manohar Nayak - Bombay.

CARE OR CONTROL

Care or control ??

I was in a  a consultation with a middle age couple.They started fighting right in front of me.  The upset husband said- See doc....I 'care' so much for her & this is what I get in return..To which the fuming wife replied- He doesn't care...he just 'controls'...!

The care from one person was perceived as control by another !

Made me think...what is care and what is control?? How to identify them??

Soon I received the answer.

I had an argument with my teenage daughter over a trivial disciplinery issue...Harsh words were exchanged leaving both of us in tears...
After sometime, as our emotions settled down , we said sorry to each other...My daughter hugged me 
and said-Papa ,you know why you got upset?  You were not  upset because I did wrong..but u were upset because I didnt follow your instructions....there is a big difference..!

I was stunned with her mature thinking pattern. ..I received my answer too... I was trying to control her under the disguise of care...that caused the conflict ....

If I really 'care' from someone , I will not get upset or angry with that person...I will keep searching different ways to help him..

If I am struggling in any relationship...I need to closely observe if there is any subtle  control hidden behind my apparent care...because

Care is an expression of love while control is an expression of ego...

Control cuts...Care connects ...

Control hurts...Care heals...

Keep caring for people but dont control them ... because

Often people are not wrong...they are just 'different'...

Keep caring... 

EGO.................the sticky thing

Let’s face it, your ego is too attached to your comfort zone. It is so used to the daily patterns, routines, and habits that it doesn’t want anything to change. It’s clingy.

And the attachment feels safe, but it’s also smothering.  No change means no growth—and no growth means slow death.  What the ego doesn’t see is that right outside of the comfort zone , is the learning zone. And time spent in the learning zone leads to growth—and growth means life.

The first step is to spend time understanding the ego and learning how we can remove it from our everyday experiences.  Because ego, distracts us from important learning opportunities—both in success and in failure—(so that it can stay inside of your comfort zone) and keeps us focused solely on ourselves and how we compare to others.  If we want to maximize our potential, however, the focus should not be on you v/s. them, but rather it should be on you v/s. where you were before.

Remember that the ego will do everything it can to convince you to stay comfy and cozy right where you are with the routine and habits you already have—rise above it and let your ego get a little uncomfortable.  The challenges that are brought forth in the learning zone are the facilitators for growth and without them, your life will be smothered from achieving it’s full potential.  Are you ready to give your ego a kick?

DEATH - Is it so frightful??

I’m sure you have challenges, things that you wish you could overcome, or things that you could get over… Stop.  Stop trying to get over it.  Because if we’re trying to get over all of the problems in our lives then our entire lifetimes are just going to be trying to get over problems—that’s all there is going to be.  And that is not a life to be proud of.  Instead, find those challenges in your life and use them!  Use them and turn them into an opportunity.

No matter how spiritually enlightened you are, or how many times you’ve thought about death and think you are okay with it, you will grieve the life you could have lived when you are dying.  You are losing the person you could have become, the things you could have done, the things you could have made with your life—you are losing that.  And there’s no way to get around that.

Death is actually not a scary thing.  The scary thing is living life without a passion and then realizing at the very last moment that it’s over and you haven’t done what you wanted to do—and that you’re not proud of your life.  That is much more terrifying.

NO DEATH NO FEAR

When you look at the surface of the ocean, you can see waves coming up and going down. You can describe these waves in terms of high or low, big or small, more vigorous or less vigorous, more beautiful or less beautiful. You can describe a wave in terms of beginning and end, birth and death. That can be compared to the historical dimension. In the historical dimension, we are concerned with birth and death, more powerful, less powerful, more beautiful, less beautiful, beginning and end and so on. Looking deeply, we can also see that the waves are at the same time water. A wave may like to seek its own true nature. The wave might suffer from fear, from complexes. A wave may say, ‘I am not as big as the other waves,’ ‘I am oppressed,’ ‘I am not as beautiful as the other waves,’ ‘I have been born and I have to die.’ The wave may suffer from these things, these ideas. But if the wave bends down and touches her true nature she will realize that she is water. Then her fear and complexes will disappear. A wave does not have to die in order to become water. She is water right here and now. We also do not have to die in order to enter the kingdom of God. The kingdom of God is our very foundation here and now. Our deepest practice is to see and touch the ultimate dimension in ourselves every day, the reality of no birth and no death.” ~ Thich Nhat Hanh, No Death, No Fear
This piece has been reproduced as is..................

LIFE is a balance

Buddha once told one of his disciples - Too much of everything is never enough. You cannot label anyone as good or bad because the virtues and vices are equally embedded in every person. Depending on how the virtues are nurtured and demonstrated, a person is perceived as good or bad.

Of course there is a limit to which one can develop the virtues. Once the limit is crossed, all virtues become bad. Vices are anyways bad, excessive or not. Anything in excess is bad. If we eat too much, we get a stomach ache and other digestive problems. Too much of sleep makes us lazy and too much of money steals our peace. The irony is despite knowing this fact, we want more and more.

Life is a delicate balance of so many combinations—between freedom and responsibility, between living in the moment and planning for future, between indulgence and self-restraint, between love and hate, between wealth and poverty, between full and empty, between attachment and renunciation, and there might be so many more combinations. Only with a good balance, we can lead a healthy and happy life.

Find the elusive balance, trust the process, accept the ups and downs, and use them as an advantage to change the game. After all LIFE is a balance.

Sorrow - A gift

Leaning towards happiness is our very nature. But does that mean you won’t experience sorrow. In fact, sorrow is an important part of your life's journey and also a catalyst for everlasting happiness. As a matter of fact only when you experience sorrow you will appreciate and value happiness. When you live life sorrow is bound to occur. The more you live, the more you will love, and the more deeply you live and love, the greater will be the rewards, but also you will have a fair share of sorrows.

As these sorrows come they will eventually go too. An example you lose a good friend it is remarkably intense at that time, the memories will fade over the years and translate into a learning experience, one day you might even laugh about it. On the other hand if you have lost your child, it will remain a part of you for as long as you are alive. The pain cannot be reasoned in any way nor can it be masked.

However, does the sorrow mean you are not allowed to feel happiness? In fact if you embrace the sorrow and overcome it, you will feel a greater sense of joy. Not necessarily the joy of immediate laughter, but the deeper joy of gratitude. Sorrow means you were given a gift; that pain means you were given something worth rejoicing in.

In a world where there are absolutely no guarantees, you were granted something beautiful for a while. Whether it was a relationship or another being that was important to your being or something else, you were granted a gift so worthwhile that sorrow has blossomed inside you now that the something is gone. Imagine a world without such gifts. That would be a true tragedy.

And if, by the way, you feel you did not cherish the gift that is now gone enough while it was here, recognize these two keys: first, just as you forgive others for being human, more than that forgive yourself. Be rest assured that you have done something right enough to recognize the value of the gift. You don’t feel sorrow for something you don’t cherish. And it is never too late to feel such gratitude, to cherish. That is the beauty of the gift.

You may no longer be able to get what or who it’s that you hurt for the back. But the bounty of the gift remains. Your sorrow proves it. So, embrace it.
It will help you remain aware of the greater happiness that the sorrow is wrapped within. It will help you move toward all the joys you so deserve. And there are plenty of them. They too are waiting for you.